Train Them Up!

The Bible instructs us to "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it." --Proverbs 22:6  Now this does not mean that a child will not make mistakes, it simply means that when you lay a foundation of Christ in the life of a child he/she will always return to it.  In order to adhere to this scripture and let it's power be effective in our lives we must apply it wholeheartedly.  So let's look into the meaning of the word train.  Merriam-Webster's dictionary defines train saying it means to form by instruction, discipline, or drill. To teach so as to make fit, qualified, or proficient. To make prepared (as by exercise) for a test of skill.  It doesn't get anymore straight-forward than that.  Training is much more than a belt to the behind, even though that is important.  Training is the strengthening of a child so that they will not be dependent on their parents for their entire lives. It is so very necessary for a parent to start early with a child and set a level of excellence and expectancy. Do not be hypocritical in the rearing of a child, so say what you do and do what you say.  I have about 6 principles to apply to the training of a child that could prove very useful towards the upbringing of a youth.  They are to Lead, Educate, Inspire, Disciple, Love and Leave.  So let's go right into it.

Lead
"And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord."--Ephesians 6:4  This verse of scripture tells us that we are to bring children up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.  We are to encourage and advise our children in the ways of Christ.  We do this by setting a good example in our everyday lives.  Children should see their parents leading fruitful lives.  They should always see you reading the Bible, praying, fasting, giving, serving and so on.  We should not only instruct our children to do these things, but prove that we mean it with our actions.  Anyone can tell a child what to do, but it's the actions that prove the most effective.  The parent serves as a child's guide.  They set the course for the child to follow.  If you want your child to know how to change a tire, show them.  If you want them to know how to tie a necktie, show them.  If you want them to know how to pray and read the Bible, show them.  Do not just expect for a child to take these tasks upon themselves.  Once you train them they can then become accountable for maintaining this information.  Even if they stray, you have done your part in laying a foundation.

Educate
Parents are a child's first educator.  From teaching them how to talk, walk, brush their teeth, eat etc..,parents are the first line of communication.  It is the responsibility of the guardian to give a child not only basic skills, but advanced life skills as well.  You should not only read the word to them, but explain what it means to them as well.  Give them study tools such as dictionaries and concordance so that they can seek out the meanings of words.  They use these instruments at school, so why not at home? Speaking of school, teaching does not have to stop with the schoolhouse.  Parents should sit down with their children and explain math, science, social studies, English and language arts.  Do not just expect for your child's future and everything they wish to become to be squarely on the shoulders of an instructor. Yes, it is their job to teach, but it is your job to PARENT and ensure the success of your OWN child. You may not be proficient in all of the subjects, but at least you can get them to the right people.

Inspire
You should be your child's #1 fan.  You are in their corner and their main source for encouragement.  Positive verbal reinforcement is so very important.  A child wants to know that you care.  Show up to that basketball or football game and cheer your heart out! That's your child!  Make them feel like a million bucks.  Tell them that they can make it no matter how it seems.  You have to speak life over your children.  Instead of yelling and cussing/fussing make sure that you lift them up.  When a child has the proper motivation they can become anything.  A strong support system makes success so much easier to obtain.

Disciple
If you are going to bring your children up in a Christian household you have to disciple them and show them how to spread the word of God.  There are young people out there that are bringing people to Christ everyday because they have been disciples and taught how to do so.  A child's mind is stronger than some people may know and they are more than capable to spread the word of the Lord.  They must be trained though.  Your children need to be in line with what God says that they can be.  My dad anointed myself and my siblings with oil on our foreheads when we were younger.  He was establishing an atmosphere of expectancy in serving the Lord. He was also saying that we belonged to God and we were covered by his son Jesus' blood.

Love
A child needs love.  Or should I say a child needs God, because God is Love.  Either way you say it, children have to have the presence of love in their lives.  So far, everything I have listed is an expression of love.  Making sure that your child has all of their needs met is a great way to express your love for them.  Food, shelter, as well as meeting emotional and psychological needs is essential to a successful upbringing. Make sure that you are talking to your children about the issues they may be facing.  A child needs to know that they can come to you if they have any concerns about anything.  There are too many secrets in black households today, but that is a whole other story.  Never underestimate how far a hug or a simple acknowledgement goes.  A child will always remember the times that they felt loved by their parents.

Leave
Of course you should always be there for your child, but you can't live forever and they don't stay little for long.  Let them go.  You have done all you can, now let your body of work speak for itself.  It's them and the Lord now and that is more than sufficient.  If you have taught them the word and set good examples for them they will be fine. Do not pray and worry about your children.  Just pray and have faith. They will come back to reality.  Everyone makes mistakes, so did you and you turned out okay.  They are just building testimony for when they come to their senses.  They eventually have to make their own decisions and everyone must give an account.  They have to obey the Lord because they have their own personal relationship with him as the word tells us "Wherefore, my beloved, as ye have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling. " Philippians 2:12. Your child must see God for themselves, not on your ticket.   Let them truly praise the Lord knowing without a doubt that they love him because of the development of their own experiential knowledge.