Single Women in the Church: The Issue of Submission

I was talking to some of my older brothers in Christ at church the other day and I received some great insight on marriage and submission.  One man was telling me how powerful and strong his marriage is because of the way his wife is submitted to him.  You see, I asked the question of "Why are there so many single women in the body of Christ"?  Now I know there may be a number of reasons for this such as, selfishness, not being ready spiritually, mentally, emotionally or physically, having trust issues etc...but submission is the key. Of course, the husband has to submit to the wife as well, and this particular gentleman is very submitted to his wife.  More importantly, they are both submitted to God and are leaders in their respective ministry areas.  This conversation however, opened my eyes to the power that a woman holds when she submits to her HUSBAND (not boyfriend or someone she is dating).  When she operates in the spirit of meekness, she operates in unlimited power.

The Bible tells us the importance of submission in Ephesians 5.  Let's take a look. It says "Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so [let] the wives [be] to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; " (Ephesians 5:22-25).  So as the word says, we should submit to each other as the Lord desires us to do so.  That goes for the man and the woman.  A lot of men take that scripture out of context to manipulate women, but we must submit one to another in Love as Christ loved the church.

When a woman chooses to submit, she chooses to WIN!  There is NO man that will turn down a woman that is ready to submit.  Many argue that this is why some black men date white women.  While I am not sure if those motives are true, it's definitely not far-fetched to think that may be a part of it.  Personally, I look at the person and what is on the inside, not the skin color, but that's another discussion.  Anyway, submission brings about peace in the household.  When two people are not constantly arguing about who's right or wrong there is the presence of calmness and agreement.  There is no longer such a strong spirit of anger, strife, and anguish.  Forgiveness and Love abounds in a peaceful relationship.  The two of you can grow together a lot easier and overcome challenges with greater success.

The man that I spoke to at church has great testimony of how much success he and his wife share.  They are debt free in their personal lives and their ministry areas at church continually grow with people that are eager to serve alongside them as well as give into their respective ministry areas time, finances, resources etc...They are so BLESSED.  I believe that this is because they have tapped into the power of submission.  They are people of prayer and always acknowledge how God is the forefront of their lives.  Submission to God FIRST is the key to a successful marriage.  I even watch their relationship at church and have heard the husband tell his wife he LOVES her and show it as well.  There is so much RESPECT between the two of them.  Respect or the lack thereof is another reason that so many women in the church are single.  So many times they just do not respect men anymore.  This has to change if these women ever want to be married.  Doing what you want to do and being disrespectful is not the way to get married.

Sometimes you have to submit even when you think the man may be wrong.  Don't argue with him, let God correct him.  When a person finds out they were wrong they become apologetic and you now have the power.  That is what submission can do for you.  Men must make sure to do their part in the role of submission as well.  The scripture says "So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.  For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: " (Ephesians 5:28-29).  So men must Love and cherish their wives as themselves and their own flesh.  He should treat her how he would want to be treated, because women reciprocate what they are given.

An important factor to note is that the man that I spoke to at church is an excellent provider.  He has a great job, is a man of prayer, treats his wife with respect, does what she requests of him, and is a leader at church.  When a man does his part, then it is easier for a woman to submit to him.  So ladies, make sure the man is being obedient to God and you can feel at peace when you follow him.  Also, submitting in the form of cooking, cleaning, not yelling back and forth, etc...will always make a man submit to you a lot easier.  Everyone knows the saying "the best way to a man's heart is through his stomach".  This IS and always will remain true.  So ladies, it doesn't hurt to throw down in the kitchen.  I have heard testimony of men that did not initially like their future wives until they mastered the kitchen.  So please believe you me, that a man LOVES a woman that can cook.

So let's prayerfully consider the power of submission.  It is pleasing to God that both men and women submit to each other in the union of marriage.  We can do this!


Below is a video from Shanel Cooper-Sykes about the power of submission from a woman's perspective.  Take a listen.

Many are the Afflictions...

Is Satan messing with you?  The Bible tells us that many are the afflictions of the righteous; but the Lord delivers him out of them all (Psalm 34:19).  Satan feels threatened and afraid when a Christian discovers their worth and whom they are.  When a Christian gets real about their faith Satan knows that he cannot stop them from obtaining EVERYTHING that God has for them.  Just remember that greater is he that is in you than he that is in the world (1 John 4:4).  Don't let Satan's predictable distractions sidetrack you from your destiny.  Continue to operate in the fruit of the spirit. " But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law." (Galatians 5:22-23).  We must maintain our composure when going through trials.  Stay focused. 


Don't stop standing on God's promises.  The weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strongholds (2 Cor. 10:4).  You do not wrestle against flesh and blood (Ephesians 6:12).  He honors his word and it will not return unto him void (Isaiah 55:11).  If he said that he will do it, then it will come to pass! It is finished, settled, done!  So when Satan begins to attack you just get excited, because that lets you know that you are on the right path.  Praise God in the midst of your circumstance, it will confuse the enemy!    They will think "why is he praising God with so much going wrong"?  It is because that's what people of faith do.  We praise in the midst of trouble because we know that we have already won.  No matter how it looks, because we walk by faith and not by sight. (2 Cor. 5:7) Here are a few things to remember when you are under attack from the enemy.


What you are going through is part of being a Christian.  "12 Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you: 13 But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ's sufferings; that, when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy." So don't feel like something unfair or wrong is going on.  Get used to the fact that as a Christian you will be tested and tried.  Be glad though, because there is glory to be had from your endurance!

What the devil meant for evil will turn around in your favor just as it states with Joseph in Genesis chapter 50 "But as for you, ye thought evil against me; [but] God meant it unto good, to bring to pass, as [it is] this day, to save much people alive. "(Genesis 50:20)  So, even when people think that what they are doing can stop you, God can make a wonderful end out of it. Their wicked plans and schemes will not work out like that thought it would.


While you are being persecuted, pray for your accusers.  Even though it may seem hard, you must pray for your enemies. "But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;" (Matthew 5:44)  Even Jesus spoke on behalf of his enemies. "Then said Jesus, Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do. And they parted his raiment, and cast lots." (Luke 23:34)  Do not hold malice against those that come against you.  Sometimes they do not even realize what they are doing.  When you hold anger and unforgiving feelings in your heart it only blocks your own blessings from flowing.  You overcome evil with good. (Romans 12:21) Besides, vengeance is the Lord's anyway even though we should not wish that on anyone.  Instead we should pray that God have mercy on their souls.  "Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but [rather] give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance [is] mine; I will repay, saith the Lord." (Romans 12:19)

You win! God has your back! He loves and protects his children.  He will see that they are successful. "So shall they fear the name of the LORD from the west, and his glory from the rising of the sun. When the enemy shall come in like a flood, the Spirit of the LORD shall lift up a standard against him. " (Isaiah 59:19)  The spirit of the Lord will come in like a flood against the enemy on your behalf!  That is so wonderful to know he has your path established.  He warns "[Saying], Touch not mine anointed, and do my prophets no harm." (Psalm 105:15) So he truly wants the best for you and will always honor his word.

Your trial is just the test before the testimony and you will be so much stronger and closer to God when all is said and done.  Don't let your trials determine your future.  Use your experiences to grow in faith.  "[We are] troubled on every side, yet not distressed; [we are] perplexed, but not in despair; Persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed; " (2 Corinthians 4:8-9) It is not over until God says that it is over.  Keep pressing toward victory!

Finally, when you have done everything that you can in the natural just STAND! Let God put his SUPER on your NATURAL to do the SUPERNATURAL!"Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand." (Ephesians 6:13)

ABC's

I have a poster in my room with this written on it.  I do not know the original author, but I feel like it's a good set of instructions so I'm posting.  Please take a look.

To Achieve Your Dreams Remember Your ABC's

Avoid negative sources, people, places, things and habits
Believe in yourself
Consider things from every angle
Don't give up and don't give in
Enjoy life today;yesterday is gone and tomorrow may never come
Family and friends are hidden treasures;seek them and enjoy their riches
Give more than you planned to
Hang on to your dreams
Ignore those who try to discourage you
Just do it
Keep trying ; no matter how hard it seems, it will get easier
Love yourself first and most
Make it happen
Never lie, cheat, or steal;always strike a fair deal
Open your eyes and see things as they really are
Practice makes perfect
Quitters never win and winners never quit
Read, study and learn about everything important in your life
Stop procrastinating
Take control of your own destiny
Understand yourself in order to better understand others
Visualize it
Want it more than anything
Xcelerate your efforts
You are unique of all God's creations; nothing can replace you
Zero in on your target and go for it

So, there it is and I pray it blesses you.  Remember though, that with any advice or words of wisdom always listen to what God tells you over anything else.  His voice should be the most important thing in your life.  God bless!

Don't be ashamed!

There are a lot of people out there both male and female that are not sexually active and some that are even still virgins.  I just want you to be encouraged today that there is nothing wrong with that.  Do not let pop culture and society tell you that you must have sex in order to be somebody.  That is a lie straight from the pits of Hell.  You are a completely unique individual.  You are not "weird" or "lame" or a "square" because you choose not to participate in sexual activity.  Of course you are going to be peculiar to the world because you are representing Christ and making wise decisions.  Anyone that calls you those names is probably jealous that you have avoided the pitfalls of premarital sex and fornication.  The Bible tells us to flee fornication anyway "Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body." 1 Corinthians 6:18 Your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost, therefore we should not sin against it.  You should never feel ashamed for honouring God "Yet if [any man suffer] as a Christian, let him not be ashamed; but let him glorify God on this behalf." 1 Peter 4:16

When you have sex outside of marriage you are putting yourself and others at risk.  You could contract an STD or get yourself pregnant ladies and guys you could have the responsibility of a child before you are ready.  The the cycle of fatherless homes then begins and continues to infect the community.  This often leads to violence, jail time, or early death.  Not to mention that some of these individuals have not been given a strong foundation in the things of God because their parents are still developing themselves.   Many of us are faced with the pressures of sexual temptation everyday.  We see it on television and in public on a regular basis.  The world would have you believe that it is the norm and that since everyone is doing it that it is okay. It is another tactic of Satan who only wants to separate you from God, but praise the Lord that he Loves us anyway and we have freedom through Jesus Christ! (John 8:36)

Men, anytime a woman tries to tempt you into sexual activity, do not be ashamed to say NO!  You may even have to run sometimes as Joseph did in the Bible (Genesis 39:7-10).  You are not weak if you have to do this.  You are just being honest with where you are at the moment.  If a woman calls you "gay" or a "punk" because you refuse to have sex with her, just shake the dust off your feet and keep it moving.  I would rather her call me names that are not true than to end up jeopardizing my walk with God.  I cannot give in when there is a great woman out there waiting for me. Plus, you will feel worse if you fall into sin with a woman and create a "soul tie".  Show her your strength by saying no and refusing to give in.  Don't be afraid of losing her, because if she can't respect your walk then she is not the woman for you anyway. Besides, if she is calling you those names then she is disrespecting Jesus as well, because I did not read any account of Jesus fornicating in the Bible.

Women, do not let a man manipulate you into sexual activity. He may even call you names like "church girl" or what have you, but do not fall for it.  A man may also try to convince you by saying that he can make you a woman by having sex with you.  The ONLY one that can make you a woman is God through the blood of Jesus!  If a man is speaking to you that way he is trying to manipulate you and play on your weaknesses or fulfillment issues.  Do not allow this to take place.  Some women feel like they have to be with someone in order to feel important or fulfilled, but that is not true.  If you have to, just get a pet or something, but do not get into a relationship with the wrong man! I repeat. Do not get into a relationship with the wrong man! Guys, you should not be with the wrong woman either. You should be equally yoked. "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?" 2 Corinthians 6:14

If you are not participating in sexual activity your life is a testimony to someone.  Yes, it will seem hard or like everyone is laughing at you. That's called persecution and it's usually an indication that you are on the right path.  You may even experience persecution from those in the church or your family as well, especially as a male because so many people feel like a male is supposed to be sexually active.  This has been a way of proving whether or not your son was gay, especially in the black community.  That is not of God and you are not gay just because you are being obedient and honouring God with your body by abstaining from sex.  Remember also, when you honour God he will honour you as well and put you on display (1 Samuel 2:30).  So let them say whatever, because God does the rewarding. "And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not." Galatians 6:9

For anyone that has participated in sex, you are a testimony as well.  God uses you in a mighty way to steer those who may be headed down the wrong path to the truth.  The word says that "[There is] therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit." Romans 8:1  So you do not have to feel condemned about your past life. When you repent God puts it into the sea of forgetfulness anyway as the scripture says "He will turn again, he will have compassion upon us; he will subdue our iniquities; and thou wilt cast all their sins into the depths of the sea." Micah 7:19  The only one who tries to bring up past sins is Satan because he is the accuser of the brethren (Revelation 12:10).  So, just rebuke that clown and go on about God's business.  Your testimony will help someone else overcome (Revelation 12:10).

So do not be ashamed because you do not have a sexual presence in the world.  Just be sure that you are serving God with all of your heart and he will take care of any area of lack in your life "Though thy beginning was small, yet thy latter end should greatly increase." Job 8:7.   Do not let others persuade you to get off of the path that God has laid out for you.  Do not grow weary, tired, or depressed from your journey, because that is only a trick of Satan to make you believe that what God said will not come to pass.  Remember, Satan is the father of lies and there is no truth found in him (John 8:44).  It may seem like your work is in vain, but don't give up "But thanks [be] to God, which giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ." -1 Corinthians 15:57 

Check out this video entitled "I will wait for you"

All of my help comes from the Lord!

My help [cometh] from the LORD, which made heaven and earth. Psalm 121:2

It is important to remember where our help comes from. We are not in this fight alone. Sometimes it seems like it is just us against the world, but remember we have the Holy Trinity and minions of angels at our side.  As Christians sometimes we forget all of the weapons that God has given us in our everyday battles. Weapons like the word of God, prayer, fasting, praise, worship and LOVE. The scripture says "(For the weapons of our warfare [are] not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds;)" --2 Cor. 10:4  We should not forget about God by trying to do everything alone and crowning ourselves as God.  We MUST use the word of God to overcome every temptation, test, and trial that is set before us.  Every answer that we need is in the word of God. Why fear when the Lord has already overcome the world? "I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have [perfect] peace and confidence. In the world you have tribulation and trials and distress and frustration; but be of good cheer [take courage; be confident, certain, undaunted]! For I have overcome the world. [I have deprived it of power to harm you and have conquered it for you.]" John 16:33 AMP Praise God! He has deprived the world of power to harm us and he has conquered it!

We should go about our christian lives in peace knowing that God has already worked things out in our favor.  "GOD IS our Refuge and Strength [mighty and impenetrable to temptation], a very present and well-proved help in trouble. ²Therefore we will not fear, though the earth should change and though the mountains be shaken into the midst of the seas, ³Though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains tremble at its swelling and tumult. Selah [pause, and calmly think of that]!" -- Psalm 46:1-3 AMP

We do not have to walk in fear, doubt or disbelief of God's promises, because God cannot lie.  He wants the best for us and he has prepared a place for us.  We must continue to fight the good fight of faith while on this earth.  We do not have to feel pressured about how we are going to accomplish something, because it is already done.  We should not be worried about tomorrow. " ³¹Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed? ³²(For after all these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things. ³³But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you." Matt. 6:31-33

So men and women of God, do not be discouraged! Keep in mind that the battle is not yours, but the Lord's and he cannot lose! The fight is already won! We Win! We Win! We Win!

Fear thou not; for I [am] with thee: be not dismayed; for I [am] thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness. -- Isaiah 41:10

Be a Gentleman. Not a Pushover.

Jesus was a nice guy not a pushover. Men of God should be nice, but not too nice so as to let people take advantage of you.  You should be balanced and consistent.  Jesus did not allow people to interfere with his Father's business.  The scripture tells us in Matthew "12 And Jesus went into the temple of God, and cast out all them that sold and bought in the temple, and overthrew the tables of the moneychangers, and the seats of them that sold doves, 13 And said unto them, It is written, My house shall be called the house of prayer; but ye have made it a den of thieves." Matt 21:12-13 Jesus was not about to allow the house of prayer to be a den of thieves.  He cast them out and overthrew the tables.  Although Jesus was nice he was not a pushover.  These are the characteristics that we should observe as men of God.  We should not allow wrongdoing to take place in our midst. 

How are we allowing ourselves to be pushovers in our personal lives?  Do you have trouble saying no? Especially to women?  Are you doing someones dirty work for them all of the time?  Are you allowing what someone else says or thinks to alter your beliefs or actions?  If so, you may be allowing yourself to be a pushover.  Let's take another look at how Jesus stayed focused on his Father's business this time in dealing with his family when they were looking for him.  The scripture says When his parents saw him, they were astonished. His mother said to him, "Son, why have you treated us like this? Your father and I have been anxiously searching for you."  "Why were you searching for me?" he asked. "Didn't you know I had to be in my Father's house?" Jesus did not even let his family get between his purpose being fulfilled.  Sometimes we have to learn to say no even to the ones we love.  We should always obey our heavenly Father first and foremost.

So now let me give some examples of being a gentleman.  Being a gentleman is seeking opportunities to relieve and assist not just women but people in general with tasks or duties that may be burdensome or overwhelming for a time or season.  For instance, the most basic form of being a gentleman may be simply holding doors, pulling out chairs, carrying heavy objects etc...  More advanced forms could be if the Lord assigns a man to assist a family or single mother with raising a son by being an example to him and providing verbal support or rearing.  I have heard testimony of men being sent to assist a woman of God to raise her child without any expectancy of anything from her just the sole purpose of assisting her with that child.  A man that does this is not a pushover, but rather a yielded vessel being used by God to be a blessing or in other words to prevent misfortune in the lives of others.

The Holy Spirit is a gentleman.  He will not come in unless you let him in.  He is not forceful or pushy, but rather allows you to have freewill to choose him.  Just allow him to guide and direct you on who you should be helping and how you should be going about ministering that help.  When you help people that the Lord does not direct you to help you open yourself up for bitterness when that individual does not reciprocate your generosity.  You should do things without strings attached anyway.  Always operate in charity and never operate in selfishness.  Continue to walk in the fruit of the spirit (Galatians 5:22-26).  Do not allow feelings of hurt to harbor in your spirit if you feel that you have been taken advantage of.  This only blocks your future blessings.  Always forgive and continue to be more like Christ each day. By reading about him you learn more about the type of man that he was and how to live a more balanced life.

Being a pushover is allowing someone to abuse you or take your kindness for weakness.  Men, some women are only after a free ride and will let you do things for them if you continue to offer.  Women, some men will take advantage of you as well if you allow them to.  Do not offer more of yourself than a person has earned.  For instance, if you are not married, then no one has earned your physical affection.  Do not give that away.  The same goes with money.  Do not throw away hard earned money on a person that only wants to use it up.  I look at money as a seed and try to only sew it into good ground.  Also men, a woman does not want a man that is a pushover.  She needs someone that can stand up to anything that she puts out and be able to handle her.  I'm not giving women an excuse to be bossy and controlling, but as a man you have to know how to institute correction in Love.  Remember, you are the head of the household and you are responsible for the decisions of the family.

One more thing guys.  If a woman does something or says something that does not line up with the word of God do not be afraid to tell her so in Love.  Do not fear losing her because if you have to compromise to keep something you will lose it anyway (Thanks Pastor).  This is how sin entered the garden of Eden.  Adam knew better and Eve did not.  When Eve listened to the serpent Adam allowed it instead of correcting her and casting the serpent out.  Do not let sin triumph again by being a  pushover.  You have to say what's right even if it means losing some friends or a love interest.  God is a God of restoration and he can restore anything that you lost better than it was before. Ultimately, you want to please God and not man.  To quote Bill Cosby "I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody."  Stop being a "yes man" and a people pleaser and stand up for what's right.  You will be so much more happy with yourself in the end.

Good Intentions

Many of us have goals and dreams that we would like to accomplish, but how many of us make those dreams a reality by taking action and bringing them to pass?  Our intentions say "Hey, I wanna do this" or "I intend on doing that" but if we do not make steps toward these intentions then they mean absolutely nothing.  My pastor has often said that "The pathway to Hell is paved with good intentions".  Procrastinating where your faith is concerned and allowing things to distract you will knock you off of the path to success.  Of course, many are familiar with the saying "Failing to plan is planning to fail" which is so true especially when concerning decisions that will improve your way of life.  We must plan and prioritize for our future.

How do our intentions relate to our relationships with others?  Well, anyone that has children or nieces and nephews should know that if we intend on doing something for them, then we should do it.  Time passes so fast these days and children grow up so very quickly.  When a parent or guardian promises something to a child and does not deliver on that promise the child can remember that broken agreement for years to come.  The excuse of "I intended to do it" does not work.  You have let the child down and must redeem yourself with them.  Otherwise, to that child the hurt remains and depending on the extent of the situation it can take a while to heal.  So, let's fast forward to adulthood and dating/marriage.  Men. Would you dare promise your wife something and not deliver? Not if you want to keep your relationship happy.  A woman does not want to be lied to and neither should you be okay with letting her down.  Likewise, ladies do not promise something great to your husband and default on the promise.

So, how many promises do we have stacked up in our good intentions file?  I once had a friend tell me that they had intended on calling me, but I never got the call.  What if I had been going through something stressful and needed encouragement?  Okay, so your heart was in the right place, so what? Please stop saying that.  What good is that going to do if they never knew that you were thinking of them. Speak up!  These types of situations should never be, especially for those of the household of faith.  So, whatever the "intention" be it a phone call,  a gift,  a meeting  or whatever, be sure to act on it because you never know who you could have blessed by doing so. 

Are we using "good intentions" with God?  Do we intend on reading our Bibles? Or intend on praying, fasting, serving at church etc...?  Are we being lazy with our faith?  "The soul of the sluggard desireth, and [hath] nothing: but the soul of the diligent shall be made fat." Proverbs 13:4 What if Jesus only had good intentions and only thought about dying for our sins, but never did so?  We would all be heading straight to Hell right now with no hope in sight.  So, we must do more that just have good intentions with our faith.  Start practicing on your faith now.  Even if you start small that is okay.  One verse of scripture per day is a great place to start.  You will add more as you continue to grow. Pray about the church that you should attend.  When you get rooted and grounded in a good church it is a great foundation that you can use to build your life upon.  The church has a ministry area for you.  Pray and ask God where you can be used and how you can be a blessing to others.  Pray that TODAY. Do not wait.  You do not know how much longer you will have a chance to ask that question.  The talents that he gives you are for the benefit of the kingdom of God.  Plus, you will be closer to the will of God for your life. 

Do not take good intentions to the gates of heaven, if so do not be surprised if you're asked to take those intentions to the gates of Hell.  I'm not trying to scare anyone, I'm just saying that it is time to stop playing around with your purpose in life.  By having only good intentions you are hurting others with misleading expectations and you are operating in selfishness by not thinking of your brother or sister.  Besides, you would not want anyone to break promises toward you.  We must have works along with our faith, otherwise it is dead.  "But wilt thou know, O vain man, that faith without works is dead? " James 2:20

Who Are You Listening To?

Many of you may have seen the childhood film Pinocchio which had a little wooden boy listening to a "conscience" depicted as a little bug named Jiminy Cricket.  This cricket was to lead Pinocchio in the right ways so that he would not get into trouble.  Of course, Pinocchio disobeyed and got into lots of trouble, but as we know the story had a happy ending.  We as Christians have the guidance of the Holy Spirit which is who we are supposed to be listening to in order to be successful and stay out of unnecessary trouble.  Oftentimes, we act just like the little boy and disobey by listening to the wrong voices and end up in worse situations than we have to. Not unlike the little boy though, we have a happy ending as well.  It is up to us to fulfill that ending by being obedient to our "conscience". "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end." --Jeremiah 29:11

So who and what are we listening to?  The Bible says "Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners." -1 Corinthians 15:33. Are we listening to people that are giving us their own opinions not based on the word of God? Are we hanging around a person that does not care what comes out of his or her mouth?  If so, we may become just like these individuals if we are not careful.  We cannot allow the words of a stranger to take root in our spirits.  Many of us start out on the right path, but get influenced by the wrong voices or when we mingle with the wrong crowd as the word says  "Ye did run well; who did hinder you that ye should not obey the truth?"  -- Galatians 5:7. What and who we surround ourselves with can often try to overcome the person that God has really called us to be.  Negative people and things in our environment are merely distractions.  Satan does not want you to reach your full potential so he wants to distract you from the word of God by any means necessary.  The Bible warns of Satan's tactics "The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have [it] more abundantly." -John 10:10. The Lord wants us to prosper and be in health even as our soul prospers is what the scripture tells us in 3 John. He desires that we listen to his words in order to complete his will and live a full life.

Where do certain thoughts and ideas come from? Some of the evil out in the world today could not just come without some form of influence or suggestion from an evil spirit.  That is why we must manage our thoughts and as the word says "Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;" --2 Corinthians 10:5.  Do not listen to these evil voices that only want your death and destruction. 

So, should you take advice from your loved ones? Well first off if they are not saved and working on renewing their minds on a daily basis, then no, probably not.  It is okay to take advice from people sometimes, but what did God say about the situation?  If you do take advice from someone be sure that it is based on the word of God.  Even with that though, the final say should come from up above through what is called a "rhema" or spoken word from God.  We should be consulting with him first and sometimes keeping his instructions completely to ourselves, until he tells us otherwise.

Are we being brainwashed by music and movies?  I personally think it is okay to take in a movie from time to time, but there has to be a balance.  The things that we allow to go into our minds can try to attach themselves to our spirit.  If we are going to watch certain things we must be careful not to meditate on the negative things that some films portray such as illicit sex, violence, profanity etc.. I know for sure that music is powerful.  I can remember where I was and sometimes what I was doing at a certain period of my life when certain songs are played.  That proves just how much music can influence you.  It can change your mood tremendously.  If the song is sad it can make you cry.  If it is upbeat it can make you happy and dance.  If it is fast and intense it could make you angry.  Some songs can even entice you to engage in sexual behavior.  That is how strong music can be.  Of course music can be very powerful on the positive side as well. Gospel music can make you cry tears of joy or shout with a voice of triumph!  Either way it is a force that you cannot deny has merit and must be enjoyed appropriately. 

It's one thing to watch the films and listen to the music of artists, but what happens when we start listening to their beliefs and ideas?  We must be careful when we receive some of the information coming from some of these people because we do not know what's in their hearts.  The word says "A good man out of the good treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is good; and an evil man out of the evil treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is evil: for of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaketh." -- Luke 6:45.  If an artist is talking about what he or she believes and it does not line up with the Bible we must not entertain those opinions.  Their opinions are being framed by their surroundings and what they are exposed to which could be anything in the world i.e. drugs, alcohol, atheists or whatever else.  You have to stand for something or you will fall for anything.

A lot of times we idolize famous people and aspire to be like them.  Why? Do we feel that they are an inspiration in some way? Maybe. The bottom line is that we should be getting our inspiration from that word of God and other Christians.  Jesus should be an inspiration to us, look at all that he did.  He OVERCAME DEATH, HELL, and THE GRAVE. If that is not an inspiration then I don't know what is.  I think I'm gonna roll with Jesus!  Of course there will always be great people to use as examples, but we should never worship those people.  We should understand that anything good that comes from a person comes from above. 

In conclusion, we must keep our ears clean and ready to hear from God.  Hatred, strife, and envy are all things that could cloud up our hearing.  Put all of these thoughts and emotions away from you in order to receive clear instructions from heaven.  It is the only way to live the BEST life God has planned for you.  In Jesus name Amen!

"5 Things Every Black Man Should Know How To Do" (Podcast)

Here is a link to the podcast interview I did with the Vibe and Vegas Show! Please take a listen. God bless!

Also, a thank you to all of the ladies at my church that inspired some of  the views in this article! Appreciate you!

Click Here To Listen!

Train Them Up!

The Bible instructs us to "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it." --Proverbs 22:6  Now this does not mean that a child will not make mistakes, it simply means that when you lay a foundation of Christ in the life of a child he/she will always return to it.  In order to adhere to this scripture and let it's power be effective in our lives we must apply it wholeheartedly.  So let's look into the meaning of the word train.  Merriam-Webster's dictionary defines train saying it means to form by instruction, discipline, or drill. To teach so as to make fit, qualified, or proficient. To make prepared (as by exercise) for a test of skill.  It doesn't get anymore straight-forward than that.  Training is much more than a belt to the behind, even though that is important.  Training is the strengthening of a child so that they will not be dependent on their parents for their entire lives. It is so very necessary for a parent to start early with a child and set a level of excellence and expectancy. Do not be hypocritical in the rearing of a child, so say what you do and do what you say.  I have about 6 principles to apply to the training of a child that could prove very useful towards the upbringing of a youth.  They are to Lead, Educate, Inspire, Disciple, Love and Leave.  So let's go right into it.

Lead
"And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord."--Ephesians 6:4  This verse of scripture tells us that we are to bring children up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.  We are to encourage and advise our children in the ways of Christ.  We do this by setting a good example in our everyday lives.  Children should see their parents leading fruitful lives.  They should always see you reading the Bible, praying, fasting, giving, serving and so on.  We should not only instruct our children to do these things, but prove that we mean it with our actions.  Anyone can tell a child what to do, but it's the actions that prove the most effective.  The parent serves as a child's guide.  They set the course for the child to follow.  If you want your child to know how to change a tire, show them.  If you want them to know how to tie a necktie, show them.  If you want them to know how to pray and read the Bible, show them.  Do not just expect for a child to take these tasks upon themselves.  Once you train them they can then become accountable for maintaining this information.  Even if they stray, you have done your part in laying a foundation.

Educate
Parents are a child's first educator.  From teaching them how to talk, walk, brush their teeth, eat etc..,parents are the first line of communication.  It is the responsibility of the guardian to give a child not only basic skills, but advanced life skills as well.  You should not only read the word to them, but explain what it means to them as well.  Give them study tools such as dictionaries and concordance so that they can seek out the meanings of words.  They use these instruments at school, so why not at home? Speaking of school, teaching does not have to stop with the schoolhouse.  Parents should sit down with their children and explain math, science, social studies, English and language arts.  Do not just expect for your child's future and everything they wish to become to be squarely on the shoulders of an instructor. Yes, it is their job to teach, but it is your job to PARENT and ensure the success of your OWN child. You may not be proficient in all of the subjects, but at least you can get them to the right people.

Inspire
You should be your child's #1 fan.  You are in their corner and their main source for encouragement.  Positive verbal reinforcement is so very important.  A child wants to know that you care.  Show up to that basketball or football game and cheer your heart out! That's your child!  Make them feel like a million bucks.  Tell them that they can make it no matter how it seems.  You have to speak life over your children.  Instead of yelling and cussing/fussing make sure that you lift them up.  When a child has the proper motivation they can become anything.  A strong support system makes success so much easier to obtain.

Disciple
If you are going to bring your children up in a Christian household you have to disciple them and show them how to spread the word of God.  There are young people out there that are bringing people to Christ everyday because they have been disciples and taught how to do so.  A child's mind is stronger than some people may know and they are more than capable to spread the word of the Lord.  They must be trained though.  Your children need to be in line with what God says that they can be.  My dad anointed myself and my siblings with oil on our foreheads when we were younger.  He was establishing an atmosphere of expectancy in serving the Lord. He was also saying that we belonged to God and we were covered by his son Jesus' blood.

Love
A child needs love.  Or should I say a child needs God, because God is Love.  Either way you say it, children have to have the presence of love in their lives.  So far, everything I have listed is an expression of love.  Making sure that your child has all of their needs met is a great way to express your love for them.  Food, shelter, as well as meeting emotional and psychological needs is essential to a successful upbringing. Make sure that you are talking to your children about the issues they may be facing.  A child needs to know that they can come to you if they have any concerns about anything.  There are too many secrets in black households today, but that is a whole other story.  Never underestimate how far a hug or a simple acknowledgement goes.  A child will always remember the times that they felt loved by their parents.

Leave
Of course you should always be there for your child, but you can't live forever and they don't stay little for long.  Let them go.  You have done all you can, now let your body of work speak for itself.  It's them and the Lord now and that is more than sufficient.  If you have taught them the word and set good examples for them they will be fine. Do not pray and worry about your children.  Just pray and have faith. They will come back to reality.  Everyone makes mistakes, so did you and you turned out okay.  They are just building testimony for when they come to their senses.  They eventually have to make their own decisions and everyone must give an account.  They have to obey the Lord because they have their own personal relationship with him as the word tells us "Wherefore, my beloved, as ye have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling. " Philippians 2:12. Your child must see God for themselves, not on your ticket.   Let them truly praise the Lord knowing without a doubt that they love him because of the development of their own experiential knowledge.

5 Things Every Black Man Should Know How to Do

In order to be the leaders of  households and in our communities there are certain things that we as men have to develop.  While every aspect of manhood won't be discussed here there are a few important aspects of leadership that can be mentioned.  If men are to be the "head" that God called us to be we must submit.  The Bible tells us "But he that is greatest among you shall be your servant." --Matthew 23:11  If we want to lead and make decisions we also have to serve.  Every great leader was a servant.  Jesus himself washed his disciples feet.  So what are some of the most important things that we should know how to do as men?

Pray
A real man must know how to pray.  A healthy prayer life is essential to any success in life that is from God.  How can he be fruitful in his life and in his relationships if he does not know how to go before the Father in prayer?  A woman must be washed in the word and both the husband and wife should cover each other in prayer.  Jesus constantly prayed and he fasted as well.  So likewise, we as men ought to pray just as Jesus did. "And he spake a parable unto them [to this end], that men ought always to pray, and not to faint;"-- Luke 18:1

Handle his Finances (Provide)
A man must be able to provide for his family and while this provision does not only apply to money, finances are a very important aspect of manhood.  He needs to be responsible with his income and be a lender and not a borrower.  While some of us may still be working towards that goal of being a lender we must in the meantime be faithful with that which we have.  Paying our bills on time, having a savings account, investments, money market accounts etc.. are very useful tools.  Having money is essential "A feast is made for laughter, and wine maketh merry: but money answereth all [things]."--Ecclesiastes 10:19.  We must be able to assist others when they are in need, because we are blessed to be a blessing.

Treat a Woman Right
A good man will know how to treat a woman.  He undertands that she has needs and he needs to be attentive to those areas in her life.  Largely a man must treat a woman with RESPECT.  No matter how heated the argument or how touchy the issue he must always respect her.  Men should appreciate the blessing that a woman is and embrace the fact that she was created to be a help meet for us.  This does not mean that she is a slave, just merely she is ordained to assist you and multiply whatever you bring her as a lady minister at my church put it "she reciprocates".  That minister went on to say "If you give her a house she will give you a home.  If you give her food she will give you a meal. If you give her your seed she will give you a child/family." Great words that are so true.  They add so much value to a man's life.  That is why we must take care of them and treat them just as we would Jesus.  If we treat her right we have treated Jesus right, because she is also your sister in Christ. "And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done [it] unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done [it] unto me." -- Matthew 25:40

Cook
That's right fellas, we need to know how to cook just as much as the ladies.  Especially in a marriage if the wife is out or cannot cook for some reason we need to be able to prepare something for the family.  Many guys at least know how to throw something on the grill, which is great!  It is also good to know how to prepare something in the kitchen.  We have to do it as single men and it can be a great asset in marriage.  We can even give the wife a break sometimes which speaks to that servanthood mentioned earlier.  You are not any less of a man in stepping into the kitchen every once in a while.

Stay Healthy
Finally a man must take care of himself where health is concerned.  Eating right, exercising, and getting good rest are all essential to his success.  Staying healthy also places you in a better position to be used by God.  If you are sick all of the time and tired you will not be very productive.  He should employ healthy living at every opportunity.  This also sets a good example for youth to follow, by providing them with a great role model.  Being relaxed and healthy will lead to a longer more fulfilling life.

Each of these five aspects of life that a man should know can be very beneficial if implemented.  Those that employ these principles are so much more fruitful in their lives than those who do not.  Your relationships will be strengthened from these instructions as well.  Even if you are not operating in all of them right now, that is okay since we are all a work in progress.  We as a community must strive to do better in these areas.  We must continue to learn and grow until we reach a better standard of living.  There are probably many more that could be added to this list but these 5 steps are very vital.  Every man should eventually know how to use these life skills.

Forgiveness vs. Foolishness

"But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses." -Mark 11:26  Jesus was explaining the importance of forgiveness even with our prayer lives.  Forgiveness is essential for the Christian in every aspect of our walk with God.  None of us are without fault, therefore how can we withold forgiveness?  Forgiveness releases favor and blessings into our lives.  So why do so many of us have a problem with forgiving?  The hurt and pain of sin and transgession towards us makes it feel hard to forgive at times.  This however, can be used as a point of power and Love.  There are so many instances of forgiveness in the Bible. Forgiveness is mentioned in several books including Matthew, Psalms, Mark, Colossians, Ephesians, 2 Corinthians, Daniel, 1 Samuel, Romans and many others.  While forgiveness is a key part of life to be a successful Christian, we must not be foolish where this is concerned. So what's the difference between forgiving and being foolish?  Let's go a little more in-depth with the subject.

Forgiveness
First of all we know forgiveness is an expression of Love, because Jesus expressed Love for us when he bore all of our sins on the cross which cleansed us from sins both past, present, and future for all-time.  Since Jesus died for us and returned with the price paid (with his precious blood) for us we can call on him when we sin "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us [our] sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."" -- 1 John 1:9. Since Jesus forgave we should be like him and forgive also.  No matter how painful it may seem, we must always forgive.  This is something many of us may have struggled with in the past, but must overcome in order to be fruitful in our lives and our walk with God. 

When we do not forgive, we give people power over us.  When someone that we have strife against comes around we allow our entire mood and mindset to change to that of hatred towards them.  We even allow them to ruin our entire day and they may not have spoken one word to us at the time. Our blood pressure may even rise when certain individuals that have wronged us come around and this behavior is is unhealthy and ungodly. How can our blessings flow if we have hatred in our hearts?  It is so easy and tempting to speak negatively of someone that has caused us pain.  We should not give in to this temptation though as we have been told not to do so in the word. "Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you." --Ephesians 4:31-32. The Bible tells us that we should even get things right with each other before bringing gifts to the altar "Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift." --Matthew 5:23-24 

When we do not forgive our blessings are blocked.  We should not hold grudges and keep an account of wrong towards us.  "Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also [do] ye. --Colossians 3:13.  So as we see from many examples from God's word, forgiving must become a part of our lives.  Everyday we will have opprtunities to either forgive or throw that away and hold anger and unforgiveness.  God wants us to choose Love and cast our cares on him.  We are not equipped to hold malice towards one another for it is destructive and deadly.  Of course Satan does not mind because he come to steal, kill, and destroy anyway --John 10:10. 

We must not give Satan any satisfaction where unforgiveness is concerned.  We must Love our enemies and do good towards them no matter how they treat us. "But I say unto you which hear, Love your enemies, do good to them which hate you, Bless them that curse you, and pray for them which despitefully use you." Luke 6:27-28. In life we have to learn to live our lives in a way that pleases the Lord.  He is not pleased with hatred and unforgiveness.  I will end this section with a few verses from Romans 12, which speaks to how we are to act towards our enemies. It is a very powerful section of scriptures. "Recompense to no man evil for evil. Provide things honest in the sight of all men. If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men. Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but [rather] give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance [is] mine; I will repay, saith the Lord. Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head. Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good. "--Romans 12:17-21

Foolishness
Now of course we know that we should always forgive for anything no matter what.  We also know that there is power in forgiveness and that we must live a life of forgiveness, but how can we get into foolishness where this is concerned?  Well even though we must forgive, we have to understand that we are dealing with people and human nature.  A lot of times people are "sorry" for something they did, but their minds have not been renewed in that area, therefore they may do it again.  This is when our desire to help someone after we forgive them clashes with foolishness.  We have forgiven them and want to assist them in their recovery, but we do so from an unsafe distance and without full understanding.  It is almost foolish to think that we can change someone anyway.  That is why we must introduce people to the word of God and let him do the changing. 

When we try to take on the challenge of saving someone ourselves we make ourselves vulnerable to hurt and pain which makes it harder to forgive and is thus, a breeding ground for bitterness.  Allowing someone to hurt you repeatedly is foolishness.  If you know that individual has a problem, then you should get them to the right people.  I mean if you stumbled into a pit of snakes and got bitten, and then after you healed would you return to the snake pit? I hope not, because if so you are practicing foolishness, which is what some of us may be doing with the people in our lives.

Sometimes our women are really guilty of this where their men are concerned.  She may be trying to assist a man that has physically abused her and she has forgiven him, but is trying to help him.  So she stays with him and even suffers in silence, because she knows what her friends may say.  He then beats her again and again.  This is foolish behavior.  He obviously needs help that she cannot provide.  She has forgiven him and therefore, she does not owe him anything, except to love him. Women oftentimes open themselves up for more hurt and pain than they have to in the first place.  When they meet a new guy they often fall head over heels and divulge their whole life story in a few hours.  This is also foolish because you must guard your heart so that bitterness, anger, wrath and other impurities cannot enter.  The Bible tells us to "Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it [are] the issues of life." --Proverbs 4:23

When you tell someone everything about you, they can use that information to hurt you.  They must earn your trust, because trust is so valuable, precious, and rare so you should not give it away haphazardly.  With this being said, if we are interacting with someone that we have interest we must keep our hearts at a distance initially until trust is established and proven.  Doing so will ensure that we do not let our hearts become damaged due to misuse from another individual.  So then, we must understand that even though we forgive no matter what, we must also do so with understanding so that abuse does not take root due to foolishness and grow into bitterness, strife, and unforgiveness.  Through Love we always have the victory!

Chivalry. Dead or Alive?

Is chivalry dead? Some would think so, but others may disagree.  I personally engage in chivalrous acts whenever I am presented with the opportunity.  Opening doors, carrying heavy items for ladies etc...  That is how I was raised.  My aunt especially taught me that when I was in the presence of a woman that I was to show her the utmost respect.  The question truly becomes do women even desire chivalry anymore?  Many women do not expect it so when they receive acts of chivalry it is a pleasant surprise.  I have also had female friends that almost demand it whenever they are out with a male.  Then again I've had female friends that thought that it was a bit too much and unnecessary.  Which brings us to the question that if chivalry is dead, did women kill it?

From my personal experiences from interacting with females, the overall consensus that I get from them is that chivalry is nice but not required.  In 2011 women are doing so many non-traditional roles that gestures from males are really uncommon.  In order to receive this type of appreciation she should set a standard of expectation early in the relationship.  If you do not require or request these things from your mate, unfortunatley, you probably will not get them.  When it seems as if women do not seemingly care, then guys will not go out of their way to do those things.  It's almost as if some women feel that if a man does these things he is weak or not manly enough when the truth is a real man will treat a woman like a queen when he first sees her and continue to do so throughout the friendship/relationship.   Why do women give so many chances to men that do not express to her an ounce of appreciation? This has to stop. Women are strong, but they are also fragile.   Being chivalrous should be a given especially with a man of God.

Ladies must understand their value and request a little more out of your man.  I'm not saying he should worship you, but if you don't care about him holding the door open and things like that then you just dealt another fatal blow to your personal respect and chivalry as a whole.

Ladies! You are not Superwoman!

I know many of you have heard of or may even use the phrase yourself  of "doing the most" or "doing too much", well ladies I'm here to tell you that some of you are doing waaay too much.  I understand that circumstances bring about responsibilities i.e. children, family, work, church, school, etc..., but "balance is the key to life". You cannot take on so many responsibilities.  You must prioritize.  You must always keep God first in everything you do so that goes without saying, and we know that you must make a living especially if you have children.  That being said it is surely not your responsibility to take care of a man.  First of all he was ordained to be the provider and therefore should be taking care of you.  Now I know that there are some ladies out there that can take care of themselves so I am not saying that you have to depend on a man for everything, I'm saying that you should not let him use you.

Many women get into relationsips with "boys" not men.  When you are dating someone who is not yet ready to be the leader of a household, it is not your responsibility to be the man yourself.  He should NOT be living in your house, sleeping in your bed, eating your food, and driving your car.  That ladies, is a boy!  After you take care of this person i.e. feed, clothe, pamper and wash his "draws" you are physically and emotionally drained and when the right man comes along you are hurt, scorned, fed up and seemingly unable to proceed with someone else.  You should not be living together in the first place, let alone having you paying for everything.  Yet another reason the Bible tells us to flee from fornication.  God forbid you get pregnant by a guy like that.

You can only be responsible for YOUR portion.  So ladies, stop trying to be Jesus to these guys.  If anything you should be leading them to Christ, not replacing Christ in their lives.  If you meet a potential mate who is not yet developed in manhood, be his friend FIRST and assist him in his development.  That may mean introducing him to other men at the church, assisting in helping him find employment, filling out resumes etc..  You do not have to just write him off completely if he is not yet a great man of God.  Let him be a man, which means he may have to find his own way a little so that he can build the kind of muscle he needs to be the leader and provider that God called him to be.  Stop feeling sorry for people.  You could actually be hindering their growth.  If they know that they can always come to you for something instead of coming to God first, you have crowned yourself their God. Ladies, do not be decieved "And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being decieved was in transgression."  ---1 Timothy 2:14  This is talking about in the garden when Eve ate not knowing what Adam knew even though he ate anyway.  We can learn from that very first encounter with sin not to let it creep up on us again.

Men that participate in this kind of behavior are not without fault, but ladies end up carrying the hurt for so much longer.  Love yourself enough to choose someone who really cares for you and will not use you for their selfish, greedy lusts.  God bless!

What's the difference?

When I'm out in public sometimes I often look around at everyone and wonder which of these people are Christans and which of them are not.  It's sometimes very hard to tell the difference.  I mean everyone is wearing the same type of clothing, having the same types of conversations, and carrying themselves no different that anyone else.  How are we going to be a light to the world if we do not let our light shine?  As Christians we are SUPPOSED to be different and stand out from the crowd.  If we are "fitting in" then something is wrong.

If I am a Christian male and my pants are sagging just as much as the guy who is not saved how am I influencing him to do any better.  I understand that no person is perfect and we should all be renewing our minds on a daily basis, so I'm not judging anyone, but as Christians we should set an example for people to follow as we follow Christ.  We should never allow ourselves to be brainwashed by societal norms when we have the Word of God to stand on.  If you do not stand for something you will fall for anything.

Our choices have to be those that are informed by the Holy Spirit.  As my pastor said this Sunday we should do things that do not displease God.  Pressure from our peers or so-called friends only hinder us from being all that God called us to be.  Even when looking for a mate, as a man of God I find that task daunting at times because some of our women of God are wearing the same "freakum dresses" as they call it, that some worldly women wear.  I'm not saying that you should judge a woman's value by her attire, but how can I tell the difference between the two?

We are all a work in progress, but that is no excuse not to try our very best everyday and continue to be "a cut above" as children of the Most High God!

Woman's Worth.....(Part 1)

A woman is so very valuable and precious.  Oftentimes we as men do not realize how valuable and fragile a woman is.  Life is actually birth from her womb.  Behind every strong man you will find a good woman.  They should be appreciated and respected even if they do not realize their own value.  As men we should never take advantage of a woman nor take her for granted.  She should not be abused verbally nor physically nor in any other fashion.  The Bible speaks highly of women and states that "Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favor of the Lord" --Proverbs 18:22.  It also says that "A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband:...." Proverbs 12:4. 

In Genesis the Bible tells us that Adam was formed from the dust of the ground, but his wife Eve was taken of a rib from Adam's side and a woman was formed from this exchange.  So even the creation of a woman was more special.  As mothers, sisters, aunts, grandmothers, daughters, nieces and so on women have helped to make the men in their lives stronger and reach his full potential. The support of women often goes unappreciated and is undervalued, but to some it is priceless.  Proverbs 31 speaks very highly of virtuous women and their roles in the household.  As men we should line our mindset up with how God values women and change our perspective of how they are to be treated.  Simple gestures such as holding doors, pulling out chairs etc.., should be observed in the prescence of a lady.  Though these are small gestures they still express tokens of your appreciation.  If a woman is in need do not look at it as an opportunity to get in good with her look at it as an opportunity to honor God regardless of whether or not she is interested in you afterwards. 

Do everything as unto the Lord, because if you do it unto the least of his brethren you have done it unto him (Matt. 25:40).  Anytime a man of God does something financial for a woman of God it should be looked at as a seed and not an expense or money lost.  We are constantly developing and renewing our minds and we will continue to get stronger in this area.  If we keep God first in all that we do including our interactions with women we will be blessed in our doing so and God will honor that.  I thank God for women, whatever their capacity be it mother or wives.  They are truly a help meet for us.

Zoo Atlanta

Me and my family had so much fun at the zoo this week.  It was packed, but still fun! Anyway the weather was good not too hot or anything.  At one point it seemed like it would rain, but it did not thank God.  We were able to enjoy a full day there and we had a great time.  It was actually my first time going since I've been here in GA.  The funny thing though is that it seemed like a lot of the animals were sleepy.  Anyways, I had a great experience and I'm sure I'll go back soon.

Be not weary...

Sometimes we can get discouraged when we feel like we're doing the right things, and nothing good seems to be happening for us.  It is important that we do not grow tired or weary of doing the right things, but instead remember why we are doing those things and keep going forward.  The Bible tells us in Galatians 6:9 "Be not weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not".  Oftentimes our breakthrough is right around the corner and if we don't give up we can enjoy the manifestation of that blessing.  When fatigue, heartache and pain try to set in it is important to remember that these are merely obstacles and distractions on the road to success and should only be used for our development and character building. 

You may not always get a pat on the back or a "good job" word of encouragement, but that's no reason to lose heart or quit.  We should focus on the purpose of why we are doing something to keep us motivated to keep pressing forward.  When we are doing things to honor God we will face opposition and tribulation which may make us feel like giving up.  We may also feel overlooked or misused by others, but complaining should not be an option.  Keep God's vision for your life in your heart and HE WILL do the rewarding.  Do not be focused on the temporary things that man and this world try to offer, but instead stay focused on the eternal things that only God can bring. Don't give up!

God is Good!

I just have to give all thanks and praise to God!  I recently obtained a paraprofessional position at Sawyer Road Elementary School in Marietta.  I am excited to get started in my field and start making a difference in the lives of children.  This is going to be a great year of many blessings! I declare it in Jesus' name! Amen!